Pustakawan Mendunia has been 2 years and the vision keeps going!
I have this (weirdly) urgency to leave a legacy in this world.
I want to have a little token from me to give a glimpse of hope, a better world, in my capacity. What is my capacity? I am a librarian by profession and I have a passion for reading, literacy, and librarianship. I find this is rare even between my circle of alumni. I am blessed to be graduated from the best university in Indonesia with this major, and passionate about it too.
Then? What shall I do?
The Past
Years ago, when I was in Jakarta, my friends and I were helping a community library nearby Ciliwung River. When I left Jakarta for a job in Surabaya, the library activity was stopped. Since then, I am terrified to join or build a community if there is no one to continue the initiative.
When I joined a youth community to teach kids in the remote areas in Mimika Regency, Papua Province, I still had this in mind. I need to make sure that even though I am no longer there, the community may survive. However, it is not easy to find an idealistic person, with the same view, and has perseverance as me. This is not boasting, but I had tried to find that person/s for years.
In Papua, I still have that positive mindset, as long as we were working on the same children and the same projects, that would not be a problem. But, it had problems then. My vision is idealistic and not compatible with others who thought of our projects lightly and did that as a matter of having fun. I am serious about teaching the students with a well-managed preparation and program. For others, why am I making it so difficult?
Then it came true, the moment I left the community in Mimika Regecny, the activity was collapsed! The community is no longer active. I moved out to Batam.
Leaving a legacy is not that easy. A good deed is not enough.
Therefore, I make sure to be more careful in Batam. I would not join any community if I know the people's values are different from mine. At all. At all. At all. Nada. I would not join at all. I met several communities in Batam, tried to attend their gathering, or joined one of their programs. However, I found out that these people only taking this as a matter of having fun and to have something nice to be shared in their IG feeds.
The Present
Enough with the lesson from the past and I make a promise to myself.
If I can't find it, then I will make it.
I will make my vision happen, and that's how Pustakawan Mendunia comes up 2 years ago. I still have that urgency to have Pustakawan Mendunia as a legacy, and this is going to be continued by the next visionary librarian/s. Even though I am retired or meeting my Father in heaven, I still wish this vision keeps going.
I am building my path on my way there. I make contact with Library Science students in UI and Uncen. Students are the key to a better future, and they shall realize that through our profession we may touch people's lives, help people to unleash their potential, giving hope, build a better world for everyone. However, most library science students do not realize their strength that well.
Therefore, I am delighted that we just finished 9 sessions with Library Science students in Universitas Cenderawasih, Papua Province. At the first moment, I really hope that this meeting would help the library science students bridging the theory they had in college with the reality in the working environment. These sessions are free, they do not need to pay anything. However, the number of attendees keep reduced until our last 2 meet up. Only Ridho and I were there in our last 2 meetups.
The Future
Future is something that we can't have yet but we can plan to.
I am feeling sorry for Papua who doesn't grab this opportunity well. Our learning session is only temporary until December 2020. I am not really sure about next year because I have a lot of projects to do with my planner.
However, I appreciated what Ridho has done and I could see his spirit of learning is so strong. After some consideration, I offer him to be part of Pustakawan Mendunia team, at least for a year. If he is willing to. And yes, he is very happy and almost ends in tears. Before, I really hope at least there would be a Papuan student standing until the end of our session. But there is none.
If you read what I have read in "The Past," you know for sure that I am very careful to make decisions about the community. Therefore, having someone get into Pustakawan Mendunia is not really easy for me. In a way to open the path of Pustakawan Mendunia as a legacy for the future, I have to overcome the fear. I need to mentor the next/another Pustakawan Mendunia, and it begins from Ridho.
Having a dream is free for everyone. However, from my reflection, there are 2 barriers which ruining our dream :
Ourselves
Listening to people who said we can't
My life is like a boat and it never sail on the calm ocean. It keeps wavy, but I would not be a person who give up to the storm or the big waves. I keep going.
As I child, I was a rebel. At least in my mind. Born and raised in a strong patriarchy culture as Bataknese (you may read my previous writing here), my barriers were my parents. So that, once I was in college, I got my freedom to say: NO. Since then, nobody could force me to do anything which is not reasonable or out of my common sense.
Been in Papua for 5 years, I grasp the essence of life: Love in a humble life. Some things might happened out of my common sense, in the term of God's perspective. This is something that we could not predict. I learn to live in faith, "in the God's time". I become a more reflective person, I found me. I am blessed to have this understanding very early, before my 30s.
Then I come to the conclusion again, the greatest barriers for your growth are:
Yourself
Listening to people who said you can't
I felt bad for my little brother who was not allowed to choose his dream college, because of the circumstance. My parents were lacking in confidence of him. They ruined my brother's self-esteem. This is something that we could not overdo, since the result of the university exam has been published. Yes, my brother is accepted in a good national university, but it's not his dream college. He was crying on the phone when I called him at midnight. I have difficulties for sleeping this whole month, I do not know if this what what you called a 'sign.' I think my little brother felt terribly sorry about himself.
The Power to be able to Dream is Very Expensive
Having a dream is free, but to have that power to allow yourself to be able to dream and go for it, to pursue it, to give the best effort for that, it's coming from yourself. Nobody could replace you. It shall coming from you. Hundreds or thousands of people might said No. However, it's you who define yourself. Are you just like what these people said about you? Or are you the person you define who you are?
I just choose the second option. I define myself.
Last month, our book club reading Laskar Pelangi, or the Rainbow Troops, which is written by Andrea Hirata. I read Laskar Pelangi twice. The first was in Bahasa Indonesia, then I just finished the English version for my book club's. My first time reading this book when I was in college. I just enjoyed the story as a fiction based on real story, oh yeah. It was another adventure story about kids. However, in my second time reading this, I read this in a totally different perspective. I worked for 5 years in remote place, not the capital city of the province. Moreover, I met these bright beautiful children who had limited access for education not because of lacking in the facilities, but in their own mindset.
Lintang gave the Rainbow Troops courage to dream! Something that Ikal dan the other troops never dare to think that further. There are more possibilities for them out there, and they have people who believe in them: Ibu Mus, Pak Hafan, and Lintang!
How to Response when Somebody Sharing His/Her Dream with You?
Said thank you. It means that you are a very dear for that someone. If you heard his/her dream kinda like giving you to response by answering "Really??"; better you hold your tongue.
For my brother's case, I felt sorry about him, because I was away not in Jakarta when the family made decision. They just decided and reported the result to me. Just like the old days hahaha (this sarcasm btw). However, I told my brother that the power to be able to dream, this is a blessing where not everyone has it.
Not everyone encouraged enough to think that they are actually able to reach their dreams by effort and working hard on it. Not everyone brave enough to see themselves as helpless and they are not capable (yet) in way to reflect, and see what else I can do to make myself do better.
My parents are not blessed by this traits. They are very simple and practical. Living a permanent life, doing good, working hard, life is good enough, and that's it. I told my brother we could not blame on our parents but that's how they are.
What Would You Do and How is Your Plan?
Therefore, I asked my brother, what would you do and how is your plan? He told me that he would having the next's year university entrance test. I told him that he has the chance for a year preparing and working hard for that. I also shared my failures and the turning points which shaped me as the current me. Moreover, I told my brother, even for me, life is not ended as just like these days. I do not see myself graduated with a bachelor degree from library and information science as the end of me. I do also have my goals. It needs effort, and I am working on it.
Like what I believe, we shall be a role model to people we love. If I encouraged my brother to be a person who is brave to dream, then I should be a person who is willing to dream and surely make the efforts on it. I told my brother that he always has his brother and sisters, and me as the 'out of the box' sister to share his stories and worries with. I am glad to know at the end of our conversation he felt better, and we prayed. I told him, never feeling alone, because nowadays, God's answering people's prayers in various ways. God might be not talking to you directly but God's words could be delivered through other people.
Some people mentioned that 'luck' is the most important aspect in someone's success. Good for me, that I do not believe in luck. You might work hard, the effort was there, you might reach for your dream, or might be not. Not because you are not capable (after those all hardworking and labor), but we are limited in our perspective as human. God provides you with even better result. This 'secret' would be unfolded once then we would say, "Oh, that's why..." hahaha. But yes, it usually take a long time until we reach that reflective mode on.
I wish more children and people in the world have the same opportunity, to have that power to be able to dream. There is one quote that I really like,
“Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss it you will land among the stars.”
I am blessed to be lend books from my inspiring boss (Please do read my previous post). She just lend me other book, Grit : the power of passion and perseverance. The book is written by Angela Duckworth. You may watch her famous Youtube TedX video below:
If the previous book, Lean In pumped me with full spirit and strength; the Grit book put my brain on fire hahaha. The book is a research summary that has been done by Angela Duckworth and other psychologists about the psychology of achievement for years. If you really into "grit," I believe you are going to finish reading the book until the last page. Moreover, you would not stop, but reflect. First, you would realise your grit score and challenged yourself that you could done better from the current you.
Actually when my boss lend me this book, I was not really interested. Because I have seen Angela Duckworth's video on Youtube before. At that moment, I did agree with her: Grit defines success, even though it's not definite only because of grit alone. I am confident to tell myself, I have this grit in my life. Angela Duckworth just helped me to define this trait as the 'grit'. So then what? This was my first response when I read the first pages of the book.
However, after reading into the part III : Grit from the Outside In. It really helped me to see grit from outer perspective. How to initiate the grit for other people? Especially in my job as a librarian who work in school. Working alone as a grittier person is not enough. You should be supported by a grittier team that lead by a grittier leader.
I do not know whether my boss really aware about this. How I see this, why did she give me this book to read? I believe not every employee has offered to borrow my boss' books. This WHY keep bugging me. If I am not mistaken then, based on Lean In and the Grit Book, my boss is going to make a grittier teamwork! Perhaps she thought that I could be a part of that dream team.
Meanwhile, as for my personal vision, I am determined to shape my vision and grit into something realistic and measured. Including this revelation I just got this morning, I would pursue my graduate program not in library science. For years, I thought a postgraduate program in Library Science is my ultimate goal. I was wrong! I would tell you later once everything has confirmed. Meanwhile, I would find details of the program and save more money for that. I am really relieved to wake up this morning once I realised my old dream!
Thank you so much for God's blessing! My boss really destined to meet me, inspired, and challenged me with many new things. A self-development life to the fullest!
Meanwhile, I am going to copy here some quotes or paragraphs that I found interesting:
How Darwin Seeing Grit
"One biographer describes Darwin as someone who kept thinking about the same questions long after others would move on to different-and no doubt easier-problems:
The normal response to being puzzled about something is to say, "I'll think about this later," and then, in effect, forget about it. With Darwin, one feels that he deliberately did not engage in this kind of semi-willful forgetting. He kept all the questions alive at the back of his mind, ready to be retrieved when a relevant bit of data presented itself.
How Nietzsche Seeing Grit
"With everything perfect, Nietzsche wrote, "we do not ask how it came to be." Instead, "we rejoice in the present fact as though it came out of the ground by magic."
"No one can see in the work of the artist how it has become," Nietzsche said.
... "Our vanity, our self-love, promotes the cult of the genius," Nietzsche said.
"For if we think of genius as something magical, we are not obliged to compare ourselves and find ourselves lacking... To call someone 'divine' means: 'here there is no need to compete.'" ... Great things are accomplished by those "people whose thinking is active in one direction, who employ everything as material, who always zealously observe their own inner life and that of others, who perceive everywhere models and incentives, who never tire of combining together the means available to them.
And what about talent?
Nietzsche implored us to consider exemplars to be, above all else, craftsmen:
"Do not talk about giftedness, inborn talents! One can name great men of all kinds who were very little gifted. They acquired greatness, became 'geniuses' (as we put it)... They all possessed that seriousness of the efficient workman which first learns to construct the parts properly before it ventures to fashion a great whole; they allowed themselves time for it, because they took more pleasure in making the little, secondary things well than in the effect of a dazzling whole."
Talent is how quickly your skills improve when you invest effort. Achievement is what happens when you take your acquired skills and use them. Of course, your opportunities-for example, having a great coach or teacher-matter tremendously, too, and maybe more than anything about the individual. .. It doesn't address these outside forces, nor because it include luck. It's about the psychology of achievement, but because psychology isn't all that matters, it's incomplete.
... What this theory says is that when you consider individuals in identical circumstances, what each achieves depends on just two things, talent and effort. Talent-how fast we improve in skill-absolutely matters. But effort factors into the calculation twice, not once. Effort build skill. At the very same time, effort makes skill productive.
How Will Smith Seeing Grit
"The separation of talent and skill," Will Smith points out, "is one of the greatest misunderstood concepts for people who are trying to excel, who have dreams, who want to do things. Talent you have naturally. Skill is only developed by hours and hours and hours of beating on your craft."
Skill is not the same thing as achievement, either. Without effort, your talent is nothing more than your unmet potential. Without effort, your skill is nothing more than what you could have done but didn't. With effort, talent becomes skill, and, at the very same time, effort makes skill productive.
"Not necessarily. But skipping around from one kind of pursuit to another-from one skill set to an entirely different one-that's not what gritty people do."
"But what if I move around a lot and, while I'm doing that, I'm working incredibly hard?"
"Grit isn't just working incredibly hard. That's only part of it."
Pause.
"Why?"
"Well, for one thing, there are no shortcuts to excellence. Developing real expertise, figuring out really hard problems, it all takes time-longer than most people imagine. And then, you know, you've got to apply those skills and produce goods or services that are valuable to people. Rome wasn't built in a day."
He was listening, so I continued.
"And here's the really important thing. Grit is about working on something you care about so much that you're willing to stay loyal to it."
"It's doing what you love. I get that."
"Right, it's doing what you love, but not just falling in love-staying in love."
By his second year at Oxford, he figured out that journalism was even better fit: "Once I learned more about being journalist and how that could get me back to Africa, and how that actually would be fun, and I could write more creatively than I first imagined journalism was, then I was like, 'Screw it, this is what I'm going to do.' I set out a very deliberate path that was possible, because the journalism industry was very hierarchical, and it was clear how to get from A to B to C to D, et cetera.
Step A was writing for Oxford's student newspaper, Cherwell. Step B was a summer internship at a small paper in Wisconsin. Step C was the St. Petersburg Times in Florida on the Metro beat. Step D was the Los Angeles Times. Step E was the New York Times as a national correspondent in Atlanta. Step F was being sent overseas to cover war stories, and in 2006-just over a decade since he'd set himself the goal-he finally reached step G: becoming the New York Times' East Africa bureau chief.
... What Jeff's journey suggests instead is passion as a compass-that thing that takes you some time to build, tinker with, and finally get right, and that then guides you on your long and winding road to where, ultimately, you want to be.
Seattle Seahawks coach Pete Carroll puts it this way: "Do you have a life philosophy?"
For some of us, the question makes no sense. We might say: Well, I have a lot of things I'm pursuing. A lot of goals. A lot of projects. Which do you mean?
But others have no problem answering with conviction: This is what I want.
Everything becomes a bit clearer when you understand the level of the goal Pete is asking about. He's not asking about what you want to get done today, specifically, or even this year. He's asking what you're trying to get out of life. In grit terms, he's asking about your passion.
Pete's philosophy is : Do things better than they have ever been done before.
... grit grows as we figure out our life philosophy, learn to dust ourselves off after rejection and disappointment, and learn to tell the difference between low-level goals that should be abandoned quickly and higher-level goals that demand more tenacity. The maturation story is that we develop the capacity for long-term passion and perseverance as we get older.
...
Grit is about holding the same top-level goal for a very long time.
Most of use become more conscientious, confident, caring, and calm with life experience. A lot of that change happens between the ages of twenty and forty, but, in fact, there is no epoch in the human life span where personality stops evolving. Collectively, these data demonstrate what personality psychologist now call "the maturity principle."
Likewise, in her interviews with "mega successful" people, journalist Hester Lacey has noticed that all of them demonstrate a striking desire to excel beyond their already remarkable level of expertise. An actor might say, 'I may never play a role perfectly, but I want to do it as well as I possibly can. And in very role, I want to bring something new. I want to develop.' A writer might say, 'I want every book I write be better than the last.'
"It is a persistent desire to do better," Hester explained. "It's the opposite of being complacent. But it's a positive state of mind not a negative one. It's not looking backward with dissatisfaction. It's looking forward and wanting to grow."
...
This is not to say that all grit paragons are saints, but rather that most gritty people see their ultimate aim's as deeply connected to the word beyond themselves.
My claim here is that, for most people, purpose is a tremendously powerful source of motivation. There may be exceptions, but the rarity of these exceptions proves the rule.
In other words, a genuinely positive, altruistic purpose is not an absolute requirement of grit. And I have to admit that, yes, it's possible to be a gritty villain.
But, on the whole, I take the survey data I've gathered, and what paragons of grit tell me in person, at face value. So, while interest is crucial to sustaining passion over the long-term, so, too, is the desire to connect with and help others.
My guess is that, if you take a moment to reflect on the times in your life when you've really been at your best-when you've risen to the challenges before you, finding strength to do what might have seemed impossible-you'll realize that the goals you achieved were connected in some way, shape, or form to the benefit of other people.
In sum, there may be gritty villains in the world, but my research suggests there are many more gritty heroes.
Fortunate indeed are those who have a top-level goal so consequential to the world that it imbues everything they do, no matter how small or tedious, with significance. Consider the parable of the bricklayers:
There bricklayers are asked: "What are you doing?"
The first says, "I am laying bricks."
The second says, "I am building a church."
The third says, "I am building the house of God."
The first bricklayer has a job. The second has a career. The third has a calling.
Many of us would like to belike the third bricklayer, but instead identify with the first or second.
... workers identify themselves as having:
a job ("I view my jib as just as a necessity of life, much like breathing or sleeping"),
a career ("I view my job primarily as a stepping-stone to other jobs", or
a calling (My work is one of the most important things in my life").
...
Those fortunate people who do see their work as a calling-as opposed to a job or a career-reliably say "my work makes the world a better place." And it's these people who seem most satisfied with their jobs and their lives overall. In one study, adults who felt their works was a calling missed at least a third fewer days of work than those with a job or a career.
...
Amy's conclusion is that it's not that some kinds of occupations are necessarily jobs and others are careers and still others are callings. Instead, what matters is whether the person doing the work believes that laying down the next brick is just something that has to be done, or instead something that will lead to further personal success, or, finally, work that connects the individual to something far greater than the self.
I agree. How you see your work is more important than your job title.
And this means that you can go from job to career to calling-all without changing your occupation.
...
"A calling is not some fully formed thing that you find," she tells advice seekers." It's much more dynamic. Whatever you do-whether you're a janitor or the CEO-you can continually look at what you do and ask how it connects to other people, how it connects to the bigger picture, how it can be an expression of your deepest values."
"In other words, a bricklayer who one day says, "I am laying bricks," might at some point become the bricklayer who recognises, "I am building the house of God."
David Yeager recommends reflecting on how the work you're already doing can make a positive contribution to society.
...
Amy Wrzesniewski recommends thinking about how, in small but meaningful ways, you can change your current work to enhance its connection to your core values.
...
"There have been so many times in my career when I wanted to pack it in, when I wanted to give up and do something easier," Rhonda told me. "But there was always someone who, in one way or another told me to keep going. I think everyone needs somebody like that. Don't you?"
It's indeed remarkable how many paragons of grit have told me with pride and awe, that their parents are their most admired and influential role models. And it's just as telling that so many paragons have, in one way or another, developed very similar interests to those of their parents. Clearly, these exemplars of grit grew up not just imitating their parents but also emulating them.
...
If you want to bring forth grit in your child, first ask how much passion and perseverance you have for your own life goals. Then ask yourself, how likely it is that your approach to parenting encourages your child to emulate you. If the answer to the first question is "a great deal," and your answer to the second is "very likely," you are already parenting for grit.
Ron Ferguson is a Harvard economist who has collected more data comparing effective and ineffective teachers than anyone I know. In one recent study, Ron partnered with the Gates Foundation to study students and teachers in 1,892 different classrooms. He found that teachers who are demanding-whose students say of the, "My teacher accepts nothing less than our best effort," and "Students in this class behave the way my teacher wants them to"-produce measurable year-to-year gains in the academic skills of their students. Teachers who are supportive and respectful-whose students say, "My teacher seems to know if something is bothering me," and "My teacher wants us to share our thoughts"-enhance students' happiness, voluntary effort in class, and college aspirations.
In deciding between an immediately lucrative career and graduate school, Cody did some hard thinking about how he'd gotten to where he was. Next fall, he'll begin a PhD program in computer science at Stanford. Here's the first sentence from his application essay, "My mission is to utilise my passion for computer science and machine learning to benefit society at large, while serving as an example of success that will shape the future of our society."
So Cody Coleman did not have a psychologically wise mother, father, or grandparent. I wish he had. What he did have was a brother who said the right thing at the right time, an extraordinarily wise and wonderful high school math teacher, and an ecosystem of other teachers, mentors, and fellow students who collectively showed him what's possible and helped him to get there.
...
A local radio station recently interviewed Cody. Toward the end of the conversation, Cody was asked what he had to say to listeners struggling to overcome similar life circumstances. "Stay positive," Cody said, "Go past those negative beliefs in what's possible and impossible and just give it a try."
Cody had these final words: "You don't need to be a parent to make a difference in someone's life. If you just care about them and get to know what's going on, you can make an impact. Try to understand what's going on in their life and help them through that. That's something I experienced firsthand. It made the difference.
"My sense, from being in admissions for over forty years, "Bill concluded, "is that most people are born with tremendous potential. The real question is whether they're encouraged to employ their good old-fashioned hard work and their grit, if you will, to its maximum. In the end, those are the people who seem to be the most successful.
Geoff sat forward and put his hands together like he was about to pray. "I'll tell you straight. I'm a father of four. I've watched many many kids who were not my own grow up. I may not have the random assignment, double-blind studies to prove it, but I can tell you what poor kids need. They need all the things you and I give to our own children. What poor kids need is a lot. But you can sum it up by saying that what they need is a decent childhood."
About a year later, Geoff gave a TED talk, and I was luck enough to be in the audience. Much of what Harlem Children's Zone did, Canada explained, was based on rock-solid scientific evidence-preschool education, for instance, and summer enrichment activities. But, there is one thing his program provided without sufficient scientific evidence to justify the expense : extracurricular activities.
"You know why?" he asked. "Because I actually like kids."
The audience laughed, and he said it again: "I actually like kids."
For many of us, the companies we work for are an important cultural force in our lives. For instance, growing up, my dad liked to refer to himself as a DuPonter. All the pencils in our house were company issued, embossed with phrase like Safety First, and my dad would light up every time a DuPont commercial came on television, sometimes even chiming in with the voice over. "Better things for better living." I think my dad only met the CEO of DuPont a handful of times, but he'd tell stories of his good judgement the way you might speak of a family war hero.
How do you know you're part of a culture that, in a very real sense, has become part of you? When you adopt a culture, you make a categorical allegiance to that in-group. You're not "sort of" a Seahawk or "sort of" a West Pointer. You either are or you aren't. You're in the group, or out of it. You can use a noun, not just just an adjective or a verb, to describe your commitment. So much depends, as it turns out, on which in-group you commit to.
The bottom line on culture and grit is: If you want to be grittier, find a gritty culture and join it. If you're a leader, and you want the people in your organisation to be grittier, create a gritty culture.
Okay, If you visited my page lately, you will realise that I rarely write something in this blog. My last post was on November, and because it was really matter. I attended a very meaningful workshop from the school. We had a very inspiring person came as our resource speaker, and you the ones who knew me very well; I would not sit and be quiet seeing a terrific person like that in front of me!
I RARELY meeting a resource speaker in person once he/she completed the speech. It because I RARELY feel if the materials given is that special or essential. However, this person is different! I was in Papua for 5 years, and had worked in this school for 2 years, I NEVER meet anyone who has that same spirit just like our resource speaker has. I do not talk about spirit in ghostly matter. This is the genuine spirit, a person who works with passion, really does what he/she say, who is brave answering challenge, and ready to take a risk. Not everyone really do what they said, not everyone willing to take a risk to put themselves to cover up their subordinates. But this resource speaker is d-i-f-f-e-r-e-n-t.
Therefore, I met her in person and asked her opinion about what I did in my library session and really motivated to ask her to have a visit to our library. However, she was very busy to taking care all the requests and failed to come visiting our library. I was disappointed. For people who know me, I am a very expressive person, and everything in my mind and my heart would be reflected on my face. Our resource speaker really understood my inquiry was real, and I really meant it.
I was doing this whole thing without knowing that she would be our 2nd rank highest boss in our school year, hahahaha!
Being Her Fans
Since beginning I am her big fans, and really excited to have her returned to our school. Again, this excitement can't be hidden on my face hahaha. When we had the employees' first met up in the school hall, she nodded and recalled my name in front of other employees, as a sign that she knew me. I thought I left a positive image on her mind.
Then, whenever I meet her, I am not like other employees who are afraid even just to say hi to her. Since beginning I am super duper friendly! I am her biggest fans here, remember? I even can share lunch together with her, having chit chat, and laughing loudly in front of her. I thought a lot of employees were surprised to see how relaxed I was in one of our lunch time. Because what I remember about her is, I am truly her fans, and I am really HAPPY having her here! Hahahaha.. I think highly of her as my boss but I am her biggest fans. Can you imagine, let's say, you are an Economic major graduate and you have Ibu Sri Mulyani as your boss. It feels amazing right?
You know for certain people, you may only rarely meet them, once or twice in a life time, and my new boss is just like that. I am confident to say this because I have spent my life time (30 years old) and RARELY meeting people that really affect me this much. She is different!
My coolest boss then lend me her book, and she said, sometimes we would be inspired to be a leader when we meet someone who inspired us! Just like how she described when she met her former school principal. Definitely, I would finish reading the book she lend me in this Independence Day's holiday! And the book is the picture whom I share with you in this post, Lean In : Women, Work, and the Will to Lead written by Sheryl Sandberg.
I hope to meeting my boss again, she could be my mentor and can guide me where and how I explore more of my talents and interests.
These are several things to be noted before you submitting yourself as part of the educator, everywhere you are :
Befriends with the research
Drew your individual belief & philosophy, is it befitted with the school system where you work
Put on an agreement about our 'image of the child' between the educator
Promote your-based-on-positive-local-culture (Indonesia) as part of the agreement
Image of the Child
We see a child is unique each, an explorer, imaginative, competent, has a voice to be respected and to have choices.
These are based on judgment: loveable, cute, innocent, and has no judgment for others.
Note :
Everyone deserves to have feelings and emotions. But remember to express yourself in an appropriate manner.
Time is the biggest challenge, time is luxury
Children need to be respected
Challenging children's thinking and have them build their opinion
If they could not do it, you better use "yet"
Bring the opportunity to let the children explore their interests
Culture Challenge: Parents intervention, the well being surrounded environment, afraid to make mistakes, gender role
Culture to Promote: Cooperation, Caring, Kindness.
You Can't Build a Strong House without a Strong Foundation
If you would love to have strong and smart children to conquer the world, you, yourself got to be be filled with knowledge and wisdom. How many parents are not ready to see their children develop differently compare to 'other children' outside there?
That's what happened with my parents. They invested everything in me and my siblings but they are not ready to see that I grow up to be different. I would not obey my parents just because they are my parents. They have to convince me and give me strong reasons to influence me to do something.
When they said, "No," and I was not satisfied with the reason, I kept it in my mind when I was a kid. My curiosity could not be answered by, "No, because I said so."
I filled up this gap by reading books and have magnificent conversations with people I meet in books or in person. You could not build a strong generation except you build your foundation first.
I think I was in high school when I read about I La Galigo's theatre show in the newspaper. Since then, I become curious about the work, which took Indonesia's folklore from South Sulawesi. I am always interested in Indonesia's high culture's values. Until one day, I read the information in Now Jakarta's website that they are going to have a performance in Jakarta after 10 years going around the world.
Such a coincidence, that I am going to visit Jakarta in the time being. I was invited as a resource speaker for the Library's Transformation Program conducted by National Library of Indonesia. We will discuss it in another post :)
So, I contacted my trusted networking friends that I was interested in the show and asked if there is anyone who is going to the show too. They offered us a 25% discount if using a certain credit card so that I asked if anyone can help me to buy the ticket :)
One very good friend of mine, Mr. Mestakung said he was into it! Hahaha. He always there be part of my life without me planning it. So here we were watching the show on July 6, 2019 in Ciputra Artpreneur :)
with Mr. Mestakung, thank you so much for your help, Mate!
The Review
Anyway, here is my review about I La Galigo's Music Theatre Work :
Script FYI I La Galigo was taken from Bugis' (a tribe from South Sumatera) heritage where the original work is a poem and written in 300.000 lines. Old people in Bugis believed this as the history where Bugis people came from. I like the way the narrator spoke in Bugis' language, and translate the rest of the conversation in Bahasa Indonesia on the screen. However, I felt bad for people who do not understand Bahasa Indonesia at all and attended the theatre. Because the committee does not provide written translation in English. One more thing to note, you could not expect that the character will speak loudly because mostly the conversation will be written. However, I see it as part of the story itself. Where originally characters in the storyline were very strong and had mystic power. If you were that strong, spoken words were no longer needed. The conversation would be built from the character's inner thought.
Character I like it! They had 100% Indonesian cast, most are people from South Sumatra. They made it variants, even I saw there were 2 Papuans. I like it also when they cast a grandma as a part of the character of the show. The committee could use a young cast and put on heavy makeup to make her look older, but they did not. An old woman is joined into the show as a 'matchmaker' for the main characters and as part of the closing scene.
Lighting Perfect! I almost in tears seeing how perfect the lighting teamwork for the show! The main character Batara and Sawerigading defined with different lighting. Batara as a father and stronger given by red light and Sawerigading lighted by blue. The lights also utilized optimally throughout the show! When it supposed to be a fight, in the middle of the sea, and how to bring the ambiance for a funny, fighting, sad, or romantic scene. Whoever the Lighting Director and the team, I salute for their hard work!
Music They use lyric in Bugis language and it really supports the story and brings us into a different situation. We need to be convinced that we are no longer there in Jakarta but be part of the story, in the Bugis and Sulawesi condition. Beautifully composed music and songs for the show by Rahayu Supanggah. Moreover, I like it also how they emphasize the power of character through the music illustration. The main character, Batara and Sawerigading frequently jumped to show their mighty power, followed by certain music illustration to differentiate their power.
Costume and Property Beautifully made and efficient. If you know Bugis' culture then you will understand the play portrayed Bugis' people life who are well known as a sea-based tribe. Most of the main characters do not change their costumes, but the supporting characters did. They also utilized sarong as part of our culture to be transformed as cock and boat, hahaha. It is very creative :)
Stage The stage is not that wide but fits with the story. I appreciated Ciputra Foundation who made an effort to commit to Indonesia's culture preservation. The Ciputra Artpreneur on the 11th floor Lotte Mart, Kuningan could be a Jakarta's sanctuary for a high quality of culture performance. It will be great if they have a permanent show schedule for every weekend in Jakarta.
The Harmony It was great! I watched several theatre performances in Jakarta but I could say, this is the BEST ever! Every aspect of the performance is so perfect. No direct communication between the characters builds the mystery ambiance on the play and there's where they maximize the music illustration. I like it also how Robert Wilson (the director of the play) interpreted every scene with the dance moves, and he made a romantic scene so beautifully breathtaking! He did not need to show a love scene in vulgar ways (bed, screaming, or shadow), but with rhythmic dancing. When the couples love each other they will dance beautifully in the same movement and rhythmic. If they at the beginning of knowing each other, the dance became hesitated. If one of the characters refused the other, then the rhythmic will be disturbed but still in an elegant way.
The Gratitude
I would like to express my gratitude for Robert Wilson as the Director, Set Design, and Lighting Concept for I La Galigo's music theatre. He must spend years to invest his time exploring the story and crazy enough to experiment with Indonesia's culture folklore where none do it before, in such a high standard. Thank you for having a faith that this show will work, and to optimize cast Indonesian as part of the 10 years show.
My reflection as an Indonesian, aside from being so proud to see how wonderfully our heritage made into theatre, I am ashamed. We have so many local heritage which is not explored yet but wasted away and not appreciated highly by us, Indonesian. I hope any Indonesian who watch the show do not only enjoy the glorious show but to reflect what have we done to preserve our culture and heritage.
I wish to enjoy more of this world level show made based on our Indonesian's heritage.
Are you my friends? Or (were) you? Hahaha. I am a person who open wide door to build friendship with anyone I meet. By time, usually I have the 'natural filter' to know people who are genuine or not. I follow that instinct and usually put those people into acquaintance category. The rest, you could happily pronounce me as your friend :)
The Treasure
For what have been happen in Timika, I become selective in building friendship now. It really takes time for me, to know you better before I reveal the 'me'. What quality usually make me fall in good friendship? It is honesty! No past is bad enough to make me not befriend with you. But once you lied, rude, and become pain in the *ss for others even though you look perfect in front of the hypocrites, definitely I will be the first one who leave you.
I do it, 100% sure with that decision and rarely changed it. I really treasure and respect friendship in that way. There who are in the category (was) my friend knew it better. There is no other way to turn back to the past friendship, except you realised you did wrong, said sorry, and changed.
If you do not know how to treasure me as your friend and treat me like I am nothing, how do I expect to be there and stay as your friend? I am not hypocrite. At the end of the they, people who befriends me for benefit will be revealed.
Friendship is like a harmonious tango dancing. As people said, it needs two for tango! If the effort to contact that person always come from my side but not from the other side to mine, it means that person probably not even consider me as a friend.
My friendship is like a precious pearl and I will not offer it to people who do not realise how rare that pearl is. Sorry :) Love Them, Encourage Them
So, what will I do for them who are my friends? I will be fully support my dearest friends in my power, in anyway I can. You can just tell me anything, open your darkest and deepest secret and I try to understand you.
However, once happened, a friend who is from opposite sex interpreted my action in different meaning. Since then, I become selective and be passive in making love action towards them. In my opinion, it's silly. Why you have to hold yourself in doing good deeds? But in Indonesian ordinary men's perspective, it may lead to something 'else', and I am tired to be misinterpreted.
If you called, I'll answer. If you wanted to be listened, I am here to listen. If you asked my opinion, I'll give my ugly truth analysis. I will not sugar coating the situation for you.
From my side, I become selective to reflect whether this person is trusted enough and in par with the extensive and out of the box mind I have. If you are the special ones whom I selected, and got a frequent phone call from me, praise the Lord, you are that special friends to me.
Adam and Eve once created perfectly but ruined everything by doing sin and exiled out The Garden of Eden. Since then, every human was born with sin, each of us. You might not believe in God or religion, and you may don't get this concept. Who decide and verify that every baby in the world is sinful and needed to be burn in hell?
Not one knows and could verify except you die, meet God (if any), either you arrive in Heaven or Hell, and return to be alive to give testify for us :) This is not how I interpret sin. Sin is human tendency to do evil.
What is evil? When you do something which is not right (not based on what Bible said).
Each of us has same opportunity to do wrong, and fall in bad action or habit. One quote that I read, and I really like it so that I remember it (I rarely remember a quote) : You may do wrong, but we always have the eraser to fix it.
You may say to people of the world that you are living a fine-good looking lifestyle but deep inside you keep asking whether this is right or not. You asked what happiness is, and you think by having temporary relationship, friendship, or just hanging around in that cafe could makes you feeling as someone.
It is not.
When you ask what happiness is, actually you are not happy. People who are happy, they just happy not even thinking and sunk in their mind, asking : whether they are happy or not.
Feeling Alone
People who say they are OK alone, actually the one who is lonely. Why I am so confident with this statement and writing. I was part of it. Please make a note, I use past tense here, yes, it was in the past.
Horrible things could be happened to anyone but actually how you react it will define who you are and how you will solve the problem. Will you give up, and let it be, just like that or you will stand, defend or yourself, and make a point this is me and I will survive.
Feeling alone and not loved is something that actually hurt people's heart. Decades, I felt alone, not loved, I need to make sure I am taking myself very well, I have to survive in this evil world. Until I released all anger in the past, asked forgiveness for people whose I hated the most, and keep praying how God could touch my heart to make it softer.
There is always HOPE
By time, I realise, the tiny witty me, a little dust in this universe, whose unimportant, not matter to the world, is LOVED by The Almighty God! God's love is so magnificent, so that he died on the cross to redeem people's sins. It's for people's sin not only for selective believers. Moreover Jesus comes to the world for the sinful people.
God's love is releasing me from pain, anger, revengeful, worry, and guilty. There is always hope for you who want to overcome the painful past to brighter and blessed life. Nothing as greater as God's love to God's love to human.
Your Choice
The second chance is always here for us.
The question now is : Do you want to leave that old path?
Have you ever watched movie "Serendipity"? In the movie, the leading character, Jonathan looked up numerous secondhand bookstores just to find one book, "Love in the Time of Cholera". In the peak of movie's conflict, it was Jonathan's fiancee who gave that book as an (almost) wedding present for him. Why that particular one book was so meaningful for him? That one peculiar "Love in the Time of Cholera" had Jonathan's old flame's phone number inside. Sometimes, this one noteworthy book felt like it was presented for you for a specific reason.
I got this feeling when I finished reading "Unveiled at Last : Discover God's Hidden Message from Genesis to Revelation". A friend I met at church handed this book over to me, either she lend me or gave it as present, it was not really clear, hahaha. However, I felt bad, because I haven't finish reading the book after more than one month. So that I made a deadline, I have to finish reading it at the latest this Friday. Then, I could return this book next Saturday when I meet my friend hahahaha.
Thank you for this book, I felt blessed! I felt I found something "new", just unveiled at last. FYI I was born and raised as a Christian. I spent my childhood as the frequent visitor of the Sunday School so that Christianity concept is not something feel foreign in my (previous) perspective. However, I found treasure while reading this book. I think it's content just so meaningful for me, so that I would like to share it with you.
There are three major theme I would like to share with you : Pray for Your Estranged Brothers/Sisters, God's Mercy Through Blindness, Obey (God) and See, and An Attainable Goal.
Pray for Your Estranged Brothers/Sisters
In page 56, Greg Livingstone asked question in front of church members in USA, "How many of us pray for American hostages held captives in Iran?" and he compared the number of people whom raised the hands with next question, "How many of us pray for Iranians who held captives and do not know Jesus (yet)?" The numbers of people who raised their hands for both two questions were surprisingly far different.
Sometimes, we tend to pray for people who seemed to be our brothers and sisters in faith. Then, what will happen for people aren't? Are they not our brothers and sisters that need to know Jesus too? So when recently there was news about terrorist bombing in Sri Lanka, I knew for sure that the victims were now rest in peace and met Jesus in heaven. The ones that urgently need our prayer actually the terrorists and the extremists. I wished that Jesus touched their heart and purify their blurred perspective about Christianity.
God's Mercy Through Blindness
I do believe that faith is a personal experience and you could not transfer this enriched experience just like that. It should be felt and done by the blessed believers with help from the Holy Spirit. No other way could do it. So that, I am not interested to have a bible debate just to compare between and have an almost fighting discussion to describe whose God is the best.
I had experience where some of my friends asked about who Jesus is, in the matter of really curious or just want to test me. Honestly, I am not really comfortable to explain it. Like what I explained to you at first, knowing Jesus as human's Saviour is a personal encountered. So, whatever I described about who God is whom I know in name of Jesus, the Redeemer, even if we spent night to do bible study, at the end, I would be under Jesus' name and the other person will be in other side.
However, reading this chapter really put my mind at ease. This is a remarkably provocative chapter! This chapter told us that it is God's mercy through blindness, so that people's mind could not see about who God is.
"And the Holy Spirit determines to whom He is going to give insight into His word based on His knowledge of our future obedience or disobedience." Weird concept, isn't? But once you read the chapter, you will understand.
So, just in case next time I would be asked the same question/had discussion about Jesus as part of Trinity, just explain and be relaxed. If the other side still insist about his/her perspective, just let be. It is not his/her time yet. Let God work in God's time, in God's way :)
Obey and See
It is not a coincidence that I read this book, that's what this book trying to interpret, hahaha. Actually I declared this with sweaty forehead lol. The book asked us to reflect, "See if this statement is true in your life, "I'll go anywhere, do anything, or say anything for God's kingdom." Yeah! That's true! It is part of my prayer since I worked in Papua until now.
Moreover, the book emphasised that, "You can't go back. Your life can't ever be the same. God has given you increased insight and you need to be obedient in your response." To obey God's word it needs sacrifice not only in material things as stated here. True, I am too ashamed to contemplate on anything left behind in my life.
"That unchanging purpose places a greater priority on the mandate of the covenant than on our own personal goals, dreams, desires and security... God is willing to forfeit our ease to see His goals and purposes brought about. That' s what the Lordship of Jesus Christ is all about. Jesus says in Luke 14:33 that we must be willing to give up ownership of all we possess if we are to be His disciples. The possessions aren't just material things. We possess goals, dreams, desires, careers, all sort of intangible things. And we must be willing to lay these at the foot of the Cross if we want to see Him accomplish through us all that we can do, and even more than we can do."
Are you brave enough to begin this journey? All you have to do just obey and said, "Here I am, God!"
An Attainable Goal
"The price of being part of God's global purpose is losing your life for His sake. But we must begin to think of ourselves, not as isolated pools, but as contributing parts of the whole composite of God's will. Each of our lives can release its potential into the mighty river of God's ultimate plan to reach all nations."
More detailed content also about how we are blessed to be a blessing, not only for brothers and sisters in faith but also for all nations in the world. This covenant between God and Abraham are enchained from the beginning of Genesis 17 until the end of the time, including us, the believers. Reading this book definitely would open your perspective wider in God's purpose for us.
Have a try to find this marvellous book in bookstore and have a faith journey together with God! Happy reading all!
Dear readers, on November 2017 our youth community in Papua was invited to give presentation to introduce our program in Singapore. We had a lot of discussion and under a pressure whether this was going to be presented properly and in good ethic or not. To be frank, the accommodation to go to Singapore should be self-funded, none could support us. Not even our parents organization.
For years, literacy action already a dominant priority in my life, so that I offered to be there. My purpose only to make sure our presentation and who we are (our organization) would be presented well and there was no hidden agenda behind it. This was how I put the organization as my priority in life.
Ms Rose from WAREIs
Afterwards, in the session at Singapore, our presentation moved the attendees's heart. They asked if there is anything they might help or any possibility for us doing collaboration. In further conversation through Facebook, they asked if they would like to have a conference in Indonesia, where shall they make it?
I replied that conference that taken place in Jakarta, Bali, is so common and no longer interesting for people in Asia. Why don't try something new, something different, such as Papua? I suggested Jayapura, because it is a capital city of Papua Province, they are blessed with magnificent scenery and natural resources, they have numbers of youth communities which involved with people.
My suggestion was accepted, and there I tried to be a help, as a bridge to meet this Singapore Entrepreneur Community with youth community in Jayapura, Papua. IYFP (Indonesian Youth Forum Papua) said they agreed to join as part of the committee of the conference. At the moment, I lived in Timika, Papua and that's why I committed to Ms Rose from Singapore Entrepreneur Community that I would give my best to help this event run well. I made promise that I would attend the conference. Timika to Jayapura is only 45 minutes by flight. The event would be held on September 2019.
The Challenges
The committee just arrived in Jakarta
Ok, if you read it in my previous posts in this blog, you'll realize that I made decision to move out from Papua. So how would I still contribute for the conference? I explained to Ms Rose that I moved out not only from the city also from the our youth community in Timika, Papua. Everything was told openly for her because I preferred to have everything clear. Ms Rose was really supportive and insisted that I had to stay and involved as the committee.
So that, as part of the committee, the team was going to Jakarta on August 2018 to have presentation in Indramayu. Ms Rose asked me to join them in Jakarta but regrettably I could not attend the presentation day. They made the presentation in weekdays where I still working in Batam. However, I could join with them from Saturday to Sunday. I asked whether she still want to meet our youth organization's founder, and she was agreed. So that I set them to meet up in Jakarta. Kind heart Ms Rose offered to reimburse my flight ticket from Batam to Jakarta but I refused. I would like to have this journey as part of my voluntary action, ethically. This was only a little contribution I could share as a part of introducing Papua in positive spotlight to people from overseas country.
When the conference was going to be held, it became our mutual agreement that every resource speaker should cover their own expenses. They are included your flight ticket and accommodation to reach Jayapura, Papua and returned home. Again, I tried to fulfilled my promise and be responsible as part of the committee and flied all the way from Batam.
Ms Rose through her networking was able to invite Miss Indonesia 2015, Ms Maria Harfanti. Our event went well and we had 60 youth attendees from various Papua communities. Hopefully they were inspired to do further and brave to be part of Papua's positive movement.
The Promise Keeps Going
We are going to have the next conference in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia this April 2019. From my location in Batam, for sure Kuala Lumpur comes closer and easier for me to reach. However, how about our friends from Jayapura, Papua?
To reach KL, we need 5 hours direct flight from Jayapura-Jakarta, plus additional hours to reach KL from Jakarta. Garuda Indonesia Airlines flight ticket offered one way flight from Jayapura-Jakarta with SGD 600. It is more expensive from my previous round ticket Batam-Jayapura (SGD 700).
Papua committee is looking for sponsors to help buying their flight tickets from Jayapura to Kuala Lumpur (for 3 people). However, for me, I need permission from my principal since I have not work for 1 year yet. Hopefully my boss would let me have 2 days off for the activity. Furthermore, I also would have my expenses to Kuala Lumpur under me.
The whole conference preparation is made by Kuala Lumpur committee. After the second phase, we are going to make the third in Singapore. So lets see and fingers are crossed for us to continue this collaboration. Hopefully we could build and expand our view as part of Asian youth movement, to improve our community better. Remember to put your best effort in fulfilling your promise and you will surprise to see where it's going to take you.
In the middle of the night, I am inspired to write a weird note about The Man! However, based on my experience, I never have a kind of type-man whom usually I am interested in. I could not set up a certain standard such as economic, education, or races background nor their physical appearance. Even though having a same faith/religion becomes a main factor in considering future spouse, you could not say, that every person who has same religion with you will perfectly fit to be the "One".
If you know my (previous) crush who might turn into love interest, you might surprise to know their background, even their appearance are various. However, I found several traits they have in common : they are gentleman, kind hearted, smart, patient, and have this "cool" attitude. The term I use here "cool" means they might active in social media but they do not overshared their private life.
So the more you posted things in the social media, shared this 'ridiculous' sissy things, I am so sorry, definitely I will lose interest. I know it might sound not fair for man. Maybe some of you would say, hey we are free to express ourselves. Expression is a normal way to have both for man and woman. However, in my opinion, real man should be The Man!
They might sick, or have one of the biggest storm in their life, but they remained calm. They are strong enough to face their problem and usually I am the one who is worried about them. Believe it or not, I am blessed with an ability or 'gift' to know when my friends are in trouble. Sometimes, in the middle of the day, this friend's name would just pop out into my mind. If this occurred, I have to make a phone call to check how he/she is doing. It always happened unexpectedly.
So what are the differences between The Man or Not The Man? The Man is a gentleman, he knows how to treat a lady. He will not say harmful things from his words or do violence. He is smart and have noble character. He knows what he wants to do. He is a decision maker of his life. He is looking forward to life with good planning. He has vision. He fulfilled his promise. He is honest.
Not the Man, if : he is still playing around with someone's feeling. He could not make a decision. He tend to see women as dumb and not knowing anything. He is looking for attention through social media. He just living the life as it is. No further planning for his life. He has no vision. He forgets his promise. He lied.
Thank you Jesus, that I met several of "The Man" character through my life so that I am optimistic that good men are still exist. The Man character is not depend on his age but based on his life experience and reflection. What I love the most from The Man character is: he might struggle heavy issues in life but he still stand and rise, to overcome these problem with a faith that Jesus will help him passed through it.
It is a privilege for me to know this The Man character is not fiction but real. I am honored, and I really wish God prepares my future spouse whose have The Man character.
Today, I have Sunday Worship Service in Orchard Road Presbyterian Church and really enjoyed their choir who sing "Be not afraid". I do not record the choir but you could see a good youtube link here. Furthermore, this is the lyric :
Be Not Afraid
based on Isaiah 43:1-4 Music by Craig Courtney
Be not afraid : For I have redeemed you;
Be not afraid: I have called you by name.
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
When you pass through the floods
They will not sweep o'er you;
When you walk through fire,
You will not be consumed;
You are mine, you are precious in my sight.
My love for you is everlasting,
My love for your shall have no end.
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
When you pass through the floods
They will not sweep o'er you;
When you walk through the fire,
You will not be consumed;
You are mine, you are precious in my sight.
You are precious in my sight. The Reflection
Everyone of us passed many obstacles and currently could be facing problems of life. You could call some of these trouble as ordinary, or might put you into dillemma. Definitely we've been there, in the middle of road, where we have no idea which decision you have to choose or it might affect not only your life but also people who you loved.
As my reflection, I think my firm decision to move out from Papua always be a strong courage for me spiritually. It was difficult, really. I made up my mind that I have to make the RIGHT decision. No other way I could compromise with evil, and I have to leave Papua. A decision where I never regret until now, but I keep saying my gratitude for God who always prepare the best plan in my life. A plan where I have no idea at all in the beginning, but God knows the best. God who sent me to Batam, as a part of God's plan in the future for me.
Listening to the choir really touched my heart. The lyric remind me, even though we are sinful but Jesus' death in cross has redeemed us! We are children of God and precious, each of us. So that, what will we do with our life facing the obstacles of life? Be not afraid, keep the faith, made God-based-decision and direct your life into Jesus' path of life. Then, you will know how you could reach the current you now: because we are belong to God and we are precious in God's sight.
Based on Dictionary.com "Arrogant" is making claims or pretensions to superior importance or rights; overbearingly assuming; insolently proud. Could we ask ourselves first, are we part of these arrogant people community?
Once, I discussed about this in my twitter. However, I think it is better to resume the whole tweets here and share this with others who might facing this arrogant people. You are not alone, folks.
Not to Cast Your Pearls to Swine
I believe you people who stop and read this post are good people. Because you are trying to find out what's wrong with these arrogant people and check whether there's something wrong with you or else. If you do not give that sh*t to arrogant people, you are not going to even search and stop in this post, rite?
So it's OK to admit to yourself, even though you are not perfect, at least you are trying to improve yourself. Be mindful, not to throw your kindness to people who don't deserve it. I know it sounds very different for what Jesus said for us to spread love, even to your enemies. Once you are slapped on your left cheek, you could offer your other cheek, Yes, definitely that's Jesus, but not me (yet). I am so sorry.
What I learned about kindness, you could do good things for people who need help, and you are in capacity for helping them. What is the difference to do good deeds to people who are in needs compare with dealing with those arrogant people? Arrogant people do not have respect to others. The most important person for them is themselves and people who could give benefits for them.
Once you let them treat you ill and have no respect for you, those arrogant people will continue do it again. They enjoy to be superior and think that they are above than you. Who are you? You are nothing and not important to them. So stop feeling guilty and try to think you might doing something wrong to these arrogant people. You are not the reason for people being arrogant. Themselves are the their problem.
Teach Arrogant People a Lesson
First, you have to learn that loving a person does not mean to always do good things for him/her. Jesus once enraged in God's Temple in Jerusalem. Jesus overthrown the merchants' tables after he found out they cheated poor people in the Temple. So, it is okay to speak to these arrogant people that what they do is hurt you.
I know when we are adult, it's not that easy for us to ask a meeting to have deep conversation. Meanwhile, a person who we will meet is arrogant, he/she could be a person whom we meet in office or other formal place. There is any possibility the condition could be turn out nasty when that person could be a two tongue and said different things behind us.
So let me give you an example how to deal with the arrogant people. Once this arrogant person attacked me in our Whatsapp Group about personal matter not related with working, I send that person a personal message. I told that person, that conversation should not written in our office Whatsapp Group. It is the first move I made to let that arrogant person know, you need to learn how to behave with communication in Whatsapp Group.
Second, let that arrogant people experience the same thing like they did to you. For example, when that person began a conversation in Whatsapp Group related to works at 8 pm, I replied. The conversation developed to 9 pm and my turn to ask a question, the arrogant person answered that it was time to sleep. What annoyed me was, if you thought it was late at night (it was 8 pm), why you have to begin the whole conversation at all? So I treated that arrogant person the same way.
Now, whenever that arrogant person asks question in our Whatsapp Group after working hours, I never read the message anymore. I will read it a day after, when I arrived in office and replied it. I do not need to tell that arrogant person what he/she did is annoyed me. But I treat that person the same way. I also need a rest just like his/her and my rest time begins after working hours ended. Period.
Third, you have to respect yourself. You could not let people step on your dignity and treat you like a trash. When that arrogant person mocked me by saying I did not understand anything, I was a fool, even cut my conversation with other people, I would not stay silent. That person did not want to listen to my opinion and insisted with him/hers meanwhile I was the one who contacted our resource speaker. So that, I wrote in our Whatsapp Group that I let that arrogant person to decide by him/herself, I have no further comment about it. I put additional comment as, "I think you might have more experience than our resource speaker" and put three thumbs as a closing statement.
Whatever. I tried my best to make our office's event successful. I was the one who contacted the resource speakers and managed the event, but this arrogant person made up her tone and conversation in the Whatsapp Group as the boss. Please! Even to offer herself to give opening speech for our event. Then the whole theory I predicted that he/she is arrogant, turned out to be true. That arrogant person really think that he/she is important and proud about him/herself. To compare for what his/her part to do in our event with me, it almost nothing. So hilarious!
Fourth, play it smart. Yes, I might do not like her and do not agree with the way he/she treated me. What the h*ll that arrogant person would be the one who do our event's opening speech? HAHAHAHA! So that, I kicked back not saying anything but replied that I am going to meet our school owner to ask whether he/she able to give the opening speech.
Fifth, still give 'proper' compassion for the arrogant people. Not to fake ourselves to be over friendly when we meet them, but just give them the 'proper' treatment. Just say ordinary thing when you bump that arrogant people somewhere, like "Hi." and done. LOL. However, when it is related with working, just do your work professionally, and if it necessary and could not be avoided to meet them, whatever just meet them. Do not put bad mood or troubled face when met them. Just put normal and serious expression regarding with working matters. When it is finished, just left, no need to be friendly and stay longer.
However, if in the future these arrogant people come over to have (simple) chit chat, believe me that they have hidden agenda. Just be cautious about it. When they told you their true motive to contact you, the decision is in your hand, whether you would like to help them or not. If you are in capacity of helping, just do it under the name of human rights.
Lesson in Life
If you've done these all five tips to deal with arrogant people, then congratulations! You've taught them a lesson in life : to treat people the same way you want to be treated. Just this afternoon, I met this arrogant person in a meeting after done these five tips. I could see there was a difference in a way he/she saw me in our discussion. That arrogant person become cautious about me and careful with his/her words. That arrogant person learned a lesson of life, and you do respect yourself.
