Friska Notes

Based on Dictionary.com "Arrogant" is making claims or pretensions to superior importance or rights; overbearingly assuming; insolently proud. Could we ask ourselves first, are we part of these arrogant people community?

Once, I discussed about this in my twitter. However, I think it is better to resume the whole tweets here and share this with others who might facing this arrogant people. You are not alone, folks.

Not to Cast Your Pearls to Swine

I believe you people who stop and read this post are good people. Because you are trying to find out what's wrong with these arrogant people and check whether there's something wrong with you or else. If you do not give that sh*t to arrogant people, you are not going to even search and stop in this post, rite?

So it's OK to admit to yourself, even though you are not perfect, at least you are trying to improve yourself. Be mindful, not to throw your kindness to people who don't deserve it. I know it sounds very different for what Jesus said for us to spread love, even to your enemies. Once you are slapped on your left cheek, you could offer your other cheek, Yes, definitely that's Jesus, but not me (yet). I am so sorry.

What I learned about kindness, you could do good things for people who need help, and you are in capacity for helping them. What is the difference to do good deeds to people who are in needs compare with dealing with those arrogant people? Arrogant people do not have respect to others. The most important person for them is themselves and people who could give benefits for them. 

Once you let them treat you ill and have no respect for you, those arrogant people will continue do it again. They enjoy to be superior and think that they are above than you. Who are you? You are nothing and not important to them. So stop feeling guilty and try to think you might doing something wrong to these arrogant people. You are not the reason for people being arrogant. Themselves are the their problem.

Teach Arrogant People a Lesson

First, you have to learn that loving a person does not mean to always do good things for him/her. Jesus once enraged in God's Temple in Jerusalem. Jesus overthrown the merchants' tables after he found out they cheated poor people in the Temple. So, it is okay to speak to these arrogant people that what they do is hurt you.

I know when we are adult, it's not that easy for us to ask a meeting to have deep conversation. Meanwhile, a person who we will meet is arrogant, he/she could be a person whom we meet in office or other formal place. There is any possibility the condition could be turn out nasty when that person could be a two tongue and said different things behind us. 

So let me give you an example how to deal with the arrogant people. Once this arrogant person attacked me in our Whatsapp Group about personal matter not related with working, I send that person a personal message. I told that person, that conversation should not written in our office Whatsapp Group. It is the first move I made to let that arrogant person know, you need to learn how to behave with communication in Whatsapp Group.

Second, let that arrogant people experience the same thing like they did to you. For example, when that person began a conversation in Whatsapp Group related to works at 8 pm, I replied. The conversation developed to 9 pm and my turn to ask a question, the arrogant person answered that it was time to sleep. What annoyed me was, if you thought it was late at night (it was 8 pm), why you have to begin the whole conversation at all? So I treated that arrogant person the same way. 

Now, whenever that arrogant person asks question in our Whatsapp Group after working hours, I never read the message anymore. I will read it a day after, when I arrived in office and replied it. I do not need to tell that arrogant person what he/she did is annoyed me. But I treat that person the same way. I also need a rest just like his/her and my rest time begins after working hours ended. Period.

Third, you have to respect yourself. You could not let people step on your dignity and treat you like a trash. When that arrogant person mocked me by saying I did not understand anything, I was a fool, even cut my conversation with other people, I would not stay silent. That person did not want to listen to my opinion and insisted with him/hers meanwhile I was the one who contacted our resource speaker. So that, I wrote in our Whatsapp Group that I let that arrogant person to decide by him/herself, I have no further comment about it. I put additional comment as, "I think you might have more experience than our resource speaker" and put three thumbs as a closing statement.

Whatever. I tried my best to make our office's event successful. I was the one who contacted the resource speakers and managed the event, but this arrogant person made up her tone and conversation in the Whatsapp Group as the boss. Please! Even to offer herself to give opening speech for our event. Then the whole theory I predicted that he/she is arrogant, turned out to be true. That arrogant person really think that he/she is important and proud about him/herself. To compare for what his/her part to do in our event with me, it almost nothing. So hilarious!

Fourth, play it smart. Yes, I might do not like her and do not agree with the way he/she treated me. What the h*ll that arrogant person would be the one who do our event's opening speech? HAHAHAHA! So that, I kicked back not saying anything but replied that I am going to meet our school owner to ask whether he/she able to give the opening speech.

Fifth, still give 'proper' compassion for the arrogant people. Not to fake ourselves to be over friendly when we meet them, but just give them the 'proper' treatment. Just say ordinary thing when you bump that arrogant people somewhere, like "Hi." and done. LOL. However, when it is related with working, just do your work professionally, and if it necessary and could not be avoided to meet them, whatever just meet them. Do not put bad mood or troubled face when met them. Just put normal and serious expression regarding with working matters. When it is finished, just left, no need to be friendly and stay longer. 

However, if in the future these arrogant people come over to have (simple) chit chat, believe me that they have hidden agenda. Just be cautious about it. When they told you their true motive to contact you, the decision is in your hand, whether you would like to help them or not. If you are in capacity of helping, just do it under the name of human rights.

Lesson in Life

If you've done these all five tips to deal with arrogant people, then congratulations! You've taught them a lesson in life : to treat people the same way you want to be treated. Just this afternoon, I met this arrogant person in a meeting after done these five tips. I could see there was a difference in a way he/she saw me in our discussion. That arrogant person become cautious about me and careful with his/her words. That arrogant person learned a lesson of life, and you do respect yourself.

Have a try and send me message about it, Ok? :*

Batam, 22 February 2019