Friska Notes

Okay, in this blog I never post anything about backstabbing before. But in my multiply blog, I have made several posts about this theme. Why I have made severals post about this? Because it happens many times to me. I thought because of my past experiences, it'll became natural to me. Just try to feel normally, when somebody do backstabbing again. Unfortunately, it doesn't happened.

I'm still mad, and can't forgive the person. I can't heal for instance. I feel hurt.
Even I can't see her name, her pictures, her ID, everywhere. Everything I saw that reminds me of her, ARGH!!! I wanna to destroy it, and just want to erase her from my life forever! But I can't.
Even I can't see her face, I'm worried that I will explode when I see her. So it's better I don't meet her in person for these months!! Beware of me!!

And it's enough for living in Indonesia!!! My Godness!!! I have already had a lot discrimination experiences as a girl, as a Christian, and as a Bataknese. Your group keeps saying that you are the only one whose got discriminated in the world. Do you realize that you do that discrimination to your minorities in Indonesia also?? Stop talking bullshit, and it's better you fix yourself, your behavior in your own country, in this discrimination country named Indonesia.

Equality still become a huge problem here in Indonesia. It happens also in my f***** family. GOD!!!! It makes me sick. For many times I got those discrimination since I was a child. And it still happens until now. When I was a child, I couldn't talk to much about the 'gender equality' (of course I didn't know much about that). Little friska just thought simple, that was not fair, when her brother was allowed do something but she was not allowed. Even tough she was angry but couldn't express it openly in front of everybody.

Little friska is bigger now, and she become me now. The one whose already read a lot, have good knowledge, whose brain working well, logically, and have a firm attitude, to express myself, whenever something wrong is happened. And when I got discriminated, I understand that I'm discriminated, and I will stand for my right and will tell my opinion in loud!! And still my mom can't understand it!!! She still gives priority to my brother first! Really, I want to explode right now!! There is no use talking about gender equality to older persons. They still can't get it!! That's happened in Indonesia. A lot of older persons and in same age as me, have a conventional way of thinking.

Another madness in Indonesia, which is dishonest and have no dignity. People easy to lie and having face in innocent set up. But truthful inside she has another points and another purposes. GO TO THE HELL!!! I don't need this kind of person. And please do not ever confirm to me, am I talking about you or not. Because, believe me, I will explode in front of you (if you are the person whom I talk about). Are you ready to receive my explosion??? Also this behavior creates other traits, which is no dignity!! Your words before, your attitude before in the past, you never think about that. And you will do anything to achieve your purposes, without have a dignity, don't think about your words and attitude before. I won't say GO TO THE HELL but will say, WHERE'S YOUR DIGNITY??? ARE YOU A BEGGAR???

ENOUGH is ENOUGH!! May Jesus forgive me whose talking those confrontation words. Also may He shows me some good friends, the real truly friends, and makes those 'CLOWNS' learn 'a lesson'.

PS. For you people who thinking I might be talk about you. Please read this : DON'T EVER TRY TO CONFIRM IT!! except you are ready to receive my explosion!!!